Quarantine Quirks: Social Anxiety

We’re all so weird. Universally. We’re bananas. And that’s okay. I used to look around and think “God, how do all these people have their shit so together, and I’m a mess?” But then I realized that they don’t. Have their shit together, that is. Everyone’s got stuff they’re muddling through. Some of us justContinue reading “Quarantine Quirks: Social Anxiety”

Figuring It Out

Simon would probably tell you that I’m rarely quiet. We’ve been together for not-quite-but-almost 17 years… so he’s a pretty good authority on all things me. It is true… I’ll happily chatter on about country music, or any injustice I spot from a million miles away, or about whatever I happen to be pondering thatContinue reading “Figuring It Out”

Feeling ALL The Feelings

Whew, y’all. I think maybe there’s this COVID-19 pandemic wall… and I’ve hit it. Not just hit it… run smack-dab-full-force-into it. The past 2 days, I just cannot seem to pull my shit together. I feel an absolutely staggering amount of fear & sadness. Not about anything specific. It’s a general mailise. Today, Publix madeContinue reading “Feeling ALL The Feelings”

Inner Voices are Bananas

Folks used to say AA would completely ruin drinking for you. Obvi, right? But here’s a truth you have to understand before that statement can make one iota of sense to you: addiction is based on lies. In active addiction, you lie to yourself. To other people. To the Universe. And the lie that keepsContinue reading “Inner Voices are Bananas”

Secrets Are Small Soul-Deaths

A woman who carries a secret is an exhausted woman. Women Who Run with the Wolves, Clarissa Pinkola Estés I gave up being exhausted in late 2008. For 33 years, I’d been collecting secrets (big and utterly minuscule) and stacking them precariously in various corners of my soul. Which meant I couldn’t round a cornerContinue reading “Secrets Are Small Soul-Deaths”

I’m Not Anxious. You’re Anxious.

I woke up on Monday so anxious that my arms were numb. When I relayed this information to Simon later, he thought I was pretty nonchalant about what he was convinced may have been a fatal malady. But this is not my first rodeo. I know precisely how my anxiety manifests. And the cold, lackContinue reading “I’m Not Anxious. You’re Anxious.”

Normal-Shmormal

Meeting with a new therapist is a bit like going on a first date–exciting, full of potential but hella unnerving. I’ve always been hell-bent on impressing my therapists with my great insight and wisdom. Which can make for an awkward therapist first-date. Typically, I wait until I’m dangling on the precipice of a dramatic, jaggedContinue reading “Normal-Shmormal”

Anxiety & Parenting (What a Fun Mix!)

I get real quippy about my anxiety sometimes. Because it’s easier to be glib and light-hearted about anxiety than to admit that sometimes it threatens to suck all the air (and joy) out of my world. And, also… I’m fortunate that, over the years, people (qualified, professional people) have given me tools to cope withContinue reading “Anxiety & Parenting (What a Fun Mix!)”

The Shark Stands Alone (with coffee)

One of my girlfriends, who I adored with what I’m now sure must’ve felt like stifling intensity, really enjoyed spending time alone. No, not like time alone with me. Time alone. Like by herself. This baffled me. What did she think when she was by herself? Didn’t she get bored? What was going on in her headContinue reading “The Shark Stands Alone (with coffee)”